09-12-2021, 10:07 PM
A disheveled, short and dark-skinned being frantically opens her maroon trench coat, spraying notes and bird seed across the floor of the Seahaven Conference Centre. It is hard to tell whether this was an accident, a diversion, or an attempt to please the duck that had been pecking at her since she arrived, although odds are it were all three.
"Sorry I'm late. I thought we were too late to enter the festival, and was too busy ironing out the details back home to notice the friendly letter left on my hotel doorstep." She adjusts her Lenin-framed glasses and flicks her scarlet scarf at the crow. "Fortunately, the delay provided us enough time to acquire a new cheese for the festival, since it would have otherwise been delayed due to a horrible mixup at the Greater Seaway Cheese and Legal Processing Plant. Now, we have two entries! One for best imported cheese - which I think we import here, anyway - and one for best cheese-related product!" She looks around the room. "I was expecting more cheese-related products, to be honest."
She stands before a small table covered in a thin white cloth dotted with little caricatures of small rubber ducks. On top is a small ball of unusual-smelling and mildly green cheese on a small pedestal. She points to the golden desk plate in front of it.
Name: Seaway Sansamooshi
Category: Best Imported Cheese
Nation: Jutsa
Region: Forest
City: Seaway
![[Image: IMG_9124.jpg?format=1000w]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ad395ba36099b72e4432660/1531395016739-I15FS4J6EK3I5CZX2MPE/IMG_9124.jpg?format=1000w)
"First we have Seaway Sansamooshi. Much like other Sansamooshi cheeses throughout Jutsa, this prized delicacy is favored by tourists and Jutsae alike. It is comprised entirely of cashew milk, brewed with agar agar, yeast, tapioca starch, and a fine hybrid of seaweed imported from Zikulenwa in the Ukshet province, butter made from avacado oil, paprika, and just a hint of finely grated yam - the part that makes it Seaway Sansamooshi rather than Punyumek Sansamooshi.
This delicacy is easy to prepare at home, and is often times made in the Cumukzi variety by adding a dash of marijuana into the cheese batter. Unfortunately, I could not bring the Cumukzi variety in with me today on account of being uninformed of Seahaven's laws regarding the substance, so I only have with me the Classical variety.
Please, enjoy as it gently melts into your mouth and provides a sweet yet spicy, buttery yet nutty, oceanic yet earthy taste all at once while you're sipping a glass of unsweetened but mildly salted lemon juice - Lemontang - and eating a plate of Nuswata, otherwise known as Baked Broccoli Leaves in Ginseng Root and Crushed Walnuts."
She then gestures over to the other item on the stand. "And now, for the ultimate piece of the festival that I and the rest of Jutsa are confident you will not be able to live without." She then promptly picks it up and puts it on her nose.
Name: The Ultimate Pleasantanizer
Category: Best Cheese Related Product
Nation: Jutsa
Region: Forest
City: Nushkip
![[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ3HKL3WmRdqNpGpZ0uGhA...Q&usqp=CAU]](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ3HKL3WmRdqNpGpZ0uGhAVtDB8-IaQgUd-pQ&usqp=CAU)
She begins talking. Unfortunately she sounds a bit like a duck... maybe this is why the duck's been following her around.
"Are you tired wa'in to eat your bost pwized and artisan cheeses, but your turred off by the tewwible sbell? Well waht do logger! Pwesenteek, the Ultimate Pleasantanizer! TM.
This hewe device is a staple in every hobe i' Jutsa. Dow you bite say this looks an awful lot like a closing pin! Add you'd be cowwect! The technology is very simbila, but has ultimately been desighed to facilitate baxibub closure of the dostril all while providig baxibub cubfort!"
She takes the pin off her nose, which looks slightly red from where the pin was.
"And to think, this masterpiece could be yours for only I20.00 or your money back if you've purchased a month-long warrantee for another I10.00. It's harty, it's handy, and it's a great help in the kitchen. Call this toll-free number," she points at another golden desk plate that has the a phone number on it," to order yours now while they're on sale. Thank you, ultimate Pleasantanizer; I certainly know I could never live without you."
She pauses and smiles while posing in front of the Ultimate Pleasantanizer as if waiting for a photo to be taken. After a good twelve seconds, she relaxes and mutters something in Jutsaish.
"Sorry I'm late. I thought we were too late to enter the festival, and was too busy ironing out the details back home to notice the friendly letter left on my hotel doorstep." She adjusts her Lenin-framed glasses and flicks her scarlet scarf at the crow. "Fortunately, the delay provided us enough time to acquire a new cheese for the festival, since it would have otherwise been delayed due to a horrible mixup at the Greater Seaway Cheese and Legal Processing Plant. Now, we have two entries! One for best imported cheese - which I think we import here, anyway - and one for best cheese-related product!" She looks around the room. "I was expecting more cheese-related products, to be honest."
She stands before a small table covered in a thin white cloth dotted with little caricatures of small rubber ducks. On top is a small ball of unusual-smelling and mildly green cheese on a small pedestal. She points to the golden desk plate in front of it.
Name: Seaway Sansamooshi
Category: Best Imported Cheese
Nation: Jutsa
Region: Forest
City: Seaway
"First we have Seaway Sansamooshi. Much like other Sansamooshi cheeses throughout Jutsa, this prized delicacy is favored by tourists and Jutsae alike. It is comprised entirely of cashew milk, brewed with agar agar, yeast, tapioca starch, and a fine hybrid of seaweed imported from Zikulenwa in the Ukshet province, butter made from avacado oil, paprika, and just a hint of finely grated yam - the part that makes it Seaway Sansamooshi rather than Punyumek Sansamooshi.
This delicacy is easy to prepare at home, and is often times made in the Cumukzi variety by adding a dash of marijuana into the cheese batter. Unfortunately, I could not bring the Cumukzi variety in with me today on account of being uninformed of Seahaven's laws regarding the substance, so I only have with me the Classical variety.
Please, enjoy as it gently melts into your mouth and provides a sweet yet spicy, buttery yet nutty, oceanic yet earthy taste all at once while you're sipping a glass of unsweetened but mildly salted lemon juice - Lemontang - and eating a plate of Nuswata, otherwise known as Baked Broccoli Leaves in Ginseng Root and Crushed Walnuts."
She then gestures over to the other item on the stand. "And now, for the ultimate piece of the festival that I and the rest of Jutsa are confident you will not be able to live without." She then promptly picks it up and puts it on her nose.
Name: The Ultimate Pleasantanizer
Category: Best Cheese Related Product
Nation: Jutsa
Region: Forest
City: Nushkip
She begins talking. Unfortunately she sounds a bit like a duck... maybe this is why the duck's been following her around.
"Are you tired wa'in to eat your bost pwized and artisan cheeses, but your turred off by the tewwible sbell? Well waht do logger! Pwesenteek, the Ultimate Pleasantanizer! TM.
This hewe device is a staple in every hobe i' Jutsa. Dow you bite say this looks an awful lot like a closing pin! Add you'd be cowwect! The technology is very simbila, but has ultimately been desighed to facilitate baxibub closure of the dostril all while providig baxibub cubfort!"
She takes the pin off her nose, which looks slightly red from where the pin was.
"And to think, this masterpiece could be yours for only I20.00 or your money back if you've purchased a month-long warrantee for another I10.00. It's harty, it's handy, and it's a great help in the kitchen. Call this toll-free number," she points at another golden desk plate that has the a phone number on it," to order yours now while they're on sale. Thank you, ultimate Pleasantanizer; I certainly know I could never live without you."
She pauses and smiles while posing in front of the Ultimate Pleasantanizer as if waiting for a photo to be taken. After a good twelve seconds, she relaxes and mutters something in Jutsaish.