[Lauchenoiria]

Lauchenoirian Guardian

Doberman angry at being branded a ‘fascist’ by KICC host
20th July 2019

Paul Doberman, leader of Lauchenoiria First, has today lodged a complaint with the Lauchenoirian Media Standards Organisation over his party being branded as ‘fascists’ by Sisil Czrn, one of the hosts on the Kvaskm International Communication Channel (KICC), a news channel based in the nation of Kvask in northern Hespia.

While discussing the new Lauchenoirian constitution, which was passed yesterday, on their broadcast on the KICC, Sisil Czrn and her co-host Klove Javtina appeared to offer support to the Anarchist Party of Yervia, and praised the protection of civil rights for members of the LGBT+ community in the new constitution. Czrn went on to use the phrase “those Lauchenoiria fascists can go choke on a rod”.

Doberman told the Lauchenoirian Guardian: “it is unacceptable that media broadcast in Lauchenoiria, regardless of which country it was originally produced in, can contain slanderous lies calling those worried about family values ‘fascists’ and threatening them. We hold journalists to higher standards in this country and it is absurd that foreign media such as that from Kvask, a country full of weak, hippie anarchists who think it’s still 1962, can be allowed to get away with such things if they want their broadcasts to be shown in Lauchenoiria.”

He then went on to accuse Kvask of being ‘dirty feminists, just like Kerlile’ and accused the two nations of working together to spread ‘misandry’ across the IDU. When contacted for comment, the Kerlian ambassador to Lauchenoiria, Iva Tordai, called the idea ‘laughable’ and did not elaborate. The Kvaskm ambassador, Vaczek Ylanav, said when approached for comment that "The idea of working with a misandrist that views the genitalia as the marker of what makes a person versus a slave is gross and ill-thought."

The seven Lauchenoiria First representatives in the federal parliament abstained on yesterday’s vote on the constitution, claiming that the new constitution did not protect the “security and sovereignty” of the Lauchenoirian people. Lauchenoiria First objected to several parts of the constitution – including the prohibition of capital punishment, and the protections of the rights of ethnic minorities – on these grounds.

Annabeth Montrose, one of the newly-elected Lauchenoiria First representatives, also publicly objected to the inclusion of protections of the rights of members of the LGBT+ community. “I support family values, and the rights of people of faith in Lauchenoiria – something the atheist government rarely takes into consideration. It is unfair to provide protection to one minority group and then insist on atheism.”

Prime Minister Josephine Alvarez responded to Lauchenoiria First’s concerns, saying: “the views of Doberman and his allies are a minority and do not reflect the opinions of the vast majority of progressive, forward-thinking Lauchenoirians. The new constitution is supported across the country, and the provisions to protect minorities are among the most welcomed sections of the new constitution.”