“Oooh I haven’t had a Lauchenoirian in so long!” Mariya Adema gushed as she entered the cell. “Hello little terrorist! You’re a fantastic birthday present!”
The captured member of Warriors of Our Earth blinked up at the new arrival warily. Her words didn’t quite make sense to him, with his head still spinning from his sudden capture. The growing fear didn’t help much either.
“I’m… who… what… where?” he struggled to think of the correct question. Luckily for him, Mariya enjoyed a nice pre-interrogation chit-chat.
“You are a terrorist. I am a professional torturer. This is your preliminary interrogation! And we’re in Xiomera,” Mariya answered the half-asked questions.
Professional torturer. Xiomera. The WOE member’s heart skipped a beat. Surely he hadn’t just heard that. People didn’t just go around openly calling themselves that. “Is this a late April Fools prank?” he asked.
Mariya laughed. “Aww, denial! I like that, Xiomerans don’t do that. No, let me explain in full what’s going to happen here. You are in Xiomera. You are a prisoner. You will answer my questions in full or you will face unbearable pain. When that’s all over, maybe you’ll be allowed to go back to Lauchenoiria. I wouldn’t count on it though. Not unless you’re really cooperative.”
“This is not real,” he shook his head. “People don’t talk like that.”
“People don’t give you ultimatums?” Mariya cocked her head. “That’s not been my experience; everything’s an ultimatum with humans. Especially capitalists, if I’m honest, but communists do it too. I don’t much care which one you are, but it might be interesting if you want to tell me!”
“People don’t go around calling themselves professional torturers and threatening people like this!” He laughed in disbelief.
“Oh, you’re confused because I don’t use the normal euphemisms? Yeah, I find they’re a waste of time. ‘Enhanced interrogation’, ‘enticement to cooperation’, the Kerlian ‘persuasive techniques’. They all mean the same thing in the end. Talk, or I hurt you.”
Kerlian. She was Kerlian. And he was in Xiomera. “Oh F*** no!” he screamed, beginning to struggle against the restraints that kept him on his chair. “You’re that Kerlian demon!”
“I see my reputation precedes me,” Mariya said smugly.
He continued to struggle, yelling for salvation from any deity that would listen. He’d heard of her, everyone involved in a crime as small as littering in the mere vicinity of the Xiomeran state had heard of her by this point. Word spread through the criminal underworld, the activist groups, the dissidents, like a wildfire from the depths of hell. If you meet her, they said, you will invite death with open arms. If you meet her, they said, you will curse your mother for giving you life. If you meet her, they said, well, don’t. You don’t want to meet her.
“HEEEEELP!” he yelled.
“Nobody’s coming to help you, little terrorist,” Mariya said, cupping his chin in her hands. “It’s just you, and me. Now, tell me, what is your name?”
*
The other one was already terrified to begin with. She’d woken up on a hard chair, her wrists and ankles secured by restraints. Her thoughts had all come at once, then: fearing what was going on, noting that this wasn’t the Lauchenoirian police’s usual method, wondering if she’d somehow crossed the Kerlian border, remembering that Kerlile no longer kidnapped people who did that, they just deported them. All this in a single second. And then the door to her cell opened and Mariya stepped in.
She’d just finished with the other WOE member, and she was still wiping blood off her hands. The new prisoner let out an involuntary gasp at the sight.
“Good morning!” Mariya began cheerily. “I’ve just been having a nice chat with your colleague! Apparently his name is ‘oh please God help me’, WOE’s plans are ‘noooooooo’ and the timescale of said plans is some unintelligible screaming. Would you concur with that analysis or do you have anything else to add or contradict?”
The prisoner desperately tried to think back to her training. “Um, my name is Irene Ramos, my date of birth is the 12th August 1998, uh, I’m Lauchenoirian… I know there’s another… oh yeah I was born in Summersea. That’s all the things I need to tell you without my lawyer. There’s a card in my wallet that has her number on it.”
“Oh sweetie,” Mariya laughed, dropping the bloody towel and bending down to eye level with the prisoner, Irene. “You’re not in Lauchenoiria any more.”
Irene had guessed it but the confirmation still made her stomach lurch. By the interrogator’s accent, she was probably in Kerlile. She just had to hope that their reforms were still going along nicely. “Hey uh, if this is Kerlile then maybe I can, uh, don’t you have a test-thing where you assess how feminist someone is? Can I sit the test and if I pass you let me go?”
“We’re not in Kerlile either,” Mariya teased, waiting to see if her prisoner would work it out. But Irene had never been to Caxcana before, and hadn’t heard the same rumours as her colleague.
“I’m sorry, I don’t understand what’s happening, I just went to a demo and I was going to go home and read a book, I didn’t do anything I swear! I didn’t even stand on the grass bit that belonged to them, I was on the public pavement.”
“Do you really think this is about stepping on grass?” Mariya burst into peals of laughter, which made Irene shudder. There was something about this woman with the Kerlian accent that gave her a cold feeling. “No, that’s not what this is about. I’ll tell you the same thing I told your friend: you are a terrorist. I am a professional torturer. This is your preliminary interrogation. And we are in Xiomera.”
“I’m not a terrorist, I…” Irene ended her denial when the rest of the sentence registered in her mind. Then she turned to the side as her stomach heaved like she was about to throw up. There wasn’t much in her stomach so nothing came out. “Uh…” she didn’t know what to say.
“So, you’ve told me your name which is more than your colleague managed. Can you tell me his name?” Mariya asked, holding a photo in front of the prisoner.
Irene, feeling faint and with her head spinning, could barely hear Mariya. But her sense of self-preservation was still in force, so she forced herself to turn towards the photo, and when she did, she let out an involuntary wince. She opened her mouth to answer and then paused, uncertain if she should cooperate or not.
“I can see you know the answer, Irene,” Mariya cooed. “And I know you understood what I told you. Must we do this the hard way?”
Irene was still frozen in indecision. She hadn’t been trained to resist torture! She went to non-violent direct action training. All she’d been taught is what she had to tell the Lauchenoirian police, what she didn’t have to tell them; how to not injure yourself with a spray-paint can and how to glue yourself to a building. She’d never even done the last one because she found glue gross! And now here was some Kerlian, in Xiomera, threatening to literally torture her if she-
Her overthinking was interrupted by Mariya grabbing one of her fingers and twisting it right back until she screamed. Of course she screamed. She wasn’t trained to resist torture!
“Clay! Clay Moss! He’s the really loud guy at all the demos who wears too much deodorant and his speeches are always a bit conspiracy-ish! Please!” Irene whimpered. Mariya let her go, and she gasped, shaking, with tears forming in the corner of her eyes.
“Thank you,” Mariya blew Irene a kiss. “For your cooperation. If only you answered in the first place, we could avoid such unpleasantness.”
Some of the tears escaped the corners of Irene’s eyes as she continued to shake and squirm in her chair. She knew pulling at the restraints was pointless and yet she couldn’t help it, just the same way she couldn’t control her breathing right now, except, except, she had to because if she stopped paying attention then the woman would do it again.
“I said,” Mariya growled, her face changing in an instant, “what is WOE planning to do next in Xiomera?”
“I don’t know!” Irene blurted out. “Please, I’m sorry, I just… I can’t breathe…”
“Aww,” Mariya said in fake concern. “Poor little terrorist.”
“No!” Irene cried. “I’m not a terrorist, I swear! I just go to demos and answer emails! Oh, and there’s the spreadsheets but they’re boring, and I guess I did design that checklist for action accessibility, and then there’s the disability friendly guide to anti-plastic messaging, but none of that is terrorism!”
“What is WOE planning in Xiomera?” Mariya repeated, opening a briefcase she’d brought along to reveal several implements Irene couldn’t identify.
“No!” Irene blurted out involuntarily, pressing herself in against the back of the chair, her eyes wide as she looked at the briefcase. “Please, I… I don’t know because they hadn’t decided yet in the meeting, I don’t go to the… the violent ones, but they’re loud and, and, they were saying something about helicopters and, wait no that was the past, it was something about boats and Auria and Mallacaland and the embassy and I think a paint bomb, or was it a real bomb? I don’t remember I don’t aaaah…”
Mariya tossed some implements back and forth between her hands, eyeing up her prisoner. She seemed to be telling the truth. Panic did have a way of clouding the memory sometimes. There were two ways Mariya could move forward. Wait for Irene to calm down, and try this again. Or force Irene to pick up the pace. Mariya was not merciful.
She stepped towards Irene, leaning until she was whispering in her ear. “I suggest you start remembering quickly,” she said, then licked a salty tear off the prisoner’s face. Then she bent over with her implement, and suddenly Irene let out a scream of more anguish than she’d ever previously known.
LIDUN President 2024 | she/her | Puppets: Kerlile, Glanainn, Yesteria, Zongongia, Zargothrax