Obituaries - Printable Version

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Obituaries - Mikitivity - 04-13-2005

I figured if I started at the bottom, another other post could surpass this one. :/

Today an obituary was forwarded to me for an engineer who died at the age of 69. When I first hired on for the state, 6 years ago, this guy showed up at a training class. He was a jerk. He was arguementative, and about stupid things. Those of us sitting in the back of the class thought, "Why won't he just shut up!"

He worked in my group about 20 years before I hired on. Something happened, and since it is so long ago, nobody knows what, but he got ticked and left. Since that time he has hated the State of California.

That all is fine, no problems.

Then I read his obituary ... the thing had a few (not many that I know about) flat out lies. WHY? Why lie in your obituary??!!?? It made some false statements about the state, claiming we were using software he wrote. Not a chance, I can pull up not only the source code of most of what we use, but the development staff down the hall can point to the CVS files, which will show that not only is the code written in computer languages that virtually didn't exist in 1981 when the guy left the state, but also happen to be only 4-10 years old.

What bothers me is that somebody needed to padd his obituary so much that they just made up stuff. I do feel bad that he died so shortly after retirement. That stinks. And though the one time I met him, I didn't like him, I do feel bad for his family and him.

My only complaint is about these little newspaper things. With that in mind, I'm torn, when I die should you guys get to do some "creative writting" for my obituary, or should I just have you guys leave nothing behind?

"Michael, he wrote NationStates, and in fact, it was better than some silly novel written by novelist Max Barry!"

(I'm not posting a copy of the obituary, but the above is almost a word for word part taken from the obituary. These things ain't supposed to be parting shots.)

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Obituaries - Sober Thought - 04-27-2005

Mikitivity --

This is very common, because it is the grieved family writing the obituary and its members want to believe their departed was great. Why not just mourn him for what he was, not what he was bitter about or imagined himself to have done?

The shock, finality and incomprehensibility of death encourages people to to stupid things, often against the express wishes of the deceased. My grandfather, a tightwad all his life, reader of The American Way of Death (an expos? of the funeral industry), a co-founder of the local inexpensive funeral society, etc., etc., was given a full funeral in a funeral home by his off spring. Go figure.

My then-spouse's grandfather, who spoke to me -- a virtual stranger -- about his funeral wishes. He had been injured in an industrial accident decades earlier and had been in declining health ever since, so he had lots of time to think about it. He wanted a simple funeral, a Protestant minister, cremation (no casket of any kind), and his ashes scattered where we once served in the merchant marine. He got a frills funeral, a Catholic priest who didn't know him and couldn't pronounce his name, an open casket where the survivors kissed the corpse. Eventually, he was cremated and his ashes scattered, but not before these indignities were inflicted.

I've written out what I want, but I'm acutely aware that my wishes may be overridden despite the fact I'm asking for nothing illegal, immoral or offensive.

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